Coming through!

Some of us have vices, others have areas that could be improved ... potentially. Hopefully. One of my lesser sides, besides my modesty, has always been my bottomless lack of patience. I just for some odd reason seem to be always in a hurry and it doesn't really even matter where to - this relates to every single aspect of my life.

In the morning I am in hurry to get to work on time. At work I am in hurry to finish million things at once. While having conversations I am in hurry to have the other person get to the point - I might in fact say the point myself if I feel the other person is taking too long [and so many of them are]. Yes, I am one of those irritating people who might finish your sentence. If my computer jams for a second, I have probably already clicked countless times and hit the table [cursing] with my mouse so that once things start to move again, I have unintentionally closed all programs without saving anything and my mouse is in 3 parts. While I walk, I do so relatively fast and with clear purpose - no strolling around for me and God forbid if one of those Sunday walkers or dreamers block my way - I will hiss like an angry cat.

Apparently I also talk very fast. I thought that would be only possible in your native language but no, it seems that one can pass that quality fairly easily to other languages as well. I recently was in a client meeting in Thailand where, after I had spoken about 7 words, the client kindly asked me to speak slower. Much slower. I did my best but it felt so unnatural that I was secretly convinced they would think I am mistaking them for mentally challenged people.

It actually gets so bad that I am even in hurry to relax. Well, I should say I am in hurry to learn to relax because relaxing would require patience which I didn't have in the first place. I've picked up numerous times "The Power of Now" and given up after two pages since I couldn't even concentrate on a theory that doesn't move forward. Don't get me wrong - I would LOVE to be able to enjoy NOW, it is just that I don't have time for it! My mind is already in tomorrow or the day after so how on earth am I supposed to reverse back to now?

When I book a holiday it seems that the actual planning and booking phase is the most exciting - usually by the time I get to the actual destination I am already thinking of where to go next. I detest any kind of tours, if it was up to me I'd probably drive with a taxi past the Eiffel tower, ask the driver to stop for 2 minutes so that I can snap a photo and then ask him to speed to Hotel Costes for an afternoon brunch.

Talking of traveling, one the most agonizing points is the following ritual [which I unfortunately go through almost every week]: rush to get to the airport on time, rush through those bloody security checks and get my laptop out the bag [WHY??], then rush through the terminal to the right gate, go through yet another security check, then rush into the airplane because I am stressed that there won't be enough luggage space for me if I arrive later, due to those annoying people who, like me, take everything they own in their carry-on luggage; subsequently I stress that I won't have time to finish the movie I am watching before we land and that the stewardess will want to have my headphones back before the movie ends. And once landed, again the same rush to stand up as soon as possible, grab the bags, rush through the crowd to the passport control. Stress, stress and more stress ... for what? For absolutely nothing.

I've only encountered one thing in life that manages slow me down a bit - physical exercise [which, quite typically I also abhor]. It seems that when I am physically tired or alternatively, seriously ill, I am finally at peace and in no hurry anywhere. I might be even nice. So, one would think that the problem is pretty easily solved ... just get your butt moving and stop whining. I honestly would, if I would have the time ... it seems being perfect is a bloody full time job!

Kicking Back in Style

Since it slowly starts to look more and more evident that we are closing the Infamous Chapter Dubai I start to think about the things that I still haven't done. It is sort of ironic if you think that for 3 years I have been moaning about how few things there are to do here and once the moment comes to take off, I'm running around stressed and crossing things off my [bucket?] list.

One of the things on my list was always one of the luxurious desert resorts Al Maha or Bab Al Shams - only living in the middle of desert does not really entice you to go and spend your weekend ... in the middle of the same bloody desert! Call me cheap but if I have to pay at least four hundred euros I'd rather go somewhere else than 30 kilometers away from my home address.

Anyhow, few days back, rushed by the growing realization that soon it might be too late, I pushed my soon-to-be-poor-hubby to get used to an idea of a whole Saturday full of R&R at Bab Al Shams. Obviously as the stingy Finnish that I am, I had planned to get up way before dawn, rub myself full of SPF10 and be there as the first eager day tourist, with my many books and gadgets. Truth to be told, we did eventually get to the desert around noon and parked ourselves in a scorching heat on a patch of grass, only to wonder "why on earth would anyone pay money to be lying in this sort excruciating heat?".

Nevertheless, the place is quite impressive. It is much more smaller than I imagined and a nice contrast to the Dubai's "the biggest and best in the world". The pool area is just amazing for chilling, lying in the water and watching the hundreds of birds and butterflies flying around. The service is [again, against the usual Dubai style] superb and the resort does really make an extra effort. I loved the way they served few times a day an ice cool facial towel and even a frozen lollipop ... I mean, let's face it ... +37 is no joke!

The day at the pool costs you approximately 70EUR per person and includes a buffet lunch at one of their restaurants. Do not let the word buffet lead you off [OK, for anyone who is not Finnish this is irrelevant information but that word creates only one connection in my mind: the horrible buffets at the ferries cruising between Finland and Sweden plus people who eat until they drop]. The cuisine served at Bab Al Shams was indeed excellent and still very modest in quantity.

Better yet, your day can be filled with all sorts of useless activities as archery, ping pong [!!!] or mini golf. You can enjoy an impressive list of massages and spa treatments, naturally against a premium price. In the end of the day you can step outside of the pool area to the Real Desert [on your own risk, as the resort kindly reminds you ... so in case you step on a viper or a scorpion, no need to come knocking on their door] and try riding a camel and holding a falcon.

Honestly - I've had my share of visitors in Dubai and been to the desert safari, which I think is the ONLY authentic experience in this land ... and yet I am having second thoughts. Forget the dune bashing, I think you are much better off by paying a few euros more and spending your day at Bab Al Shams ... sipping the cocktails YOU want, having an excellent lunch and doing the rest of the Arabic treat.

Or maybe it is just me becoming a lazy b***ch ...

Crash Test Dummies

One of the easily most frustrating parts of the daily Dubai life is the traffic and especially the lack of basic driving etiquette in this region. First imagine the local population who literally didn't even have proper housing, let alone cars and roads about 50 years back. Then add to that equation approximately 1.7 million Indians and 1.25 million Pakistanis whose domestic driving conditions leave a lot to hope for. Surely enough for someone who comes from such a square country as Finland the chaos here is a nightmare but I can at least do my best to try to accept that. What I cannot accept is the way people have absolutely no respect for other people's safety whatsoever. Honestly, you want to kill yourself? Knock yourself out, just leave me out of it.

The most horrendous part of this complete lack of respect for life are the thousands of parents who drive around Dubai with kids in their cars - completely unrestrained. I'm not just referring to not having a proper child seat in your car, I literally mean completely unrestrained. I cannot fathom that you have children loose in the car and nowhere in your head a bell goes off "Oh wait, what happens with them if I have an accident?". The kids jump between the back and front seats, hang in the middle, fight, push half of their bodies out of the window or the sunroof and the parents don't even seem to notice.

The results? Yearly 53,000 children in UAE get injured in traffic and 500 lose their lives. That is just ridiculous! Most of the injuries and deaths can be easily avoided and yet it seems that these parents do not even care. The past weeks there has been a road safety campaign to alert the public of the hazards and this has been spearheaded by one of the Shaikhas [a wife of a Sheikh] who, I quote "stresses on the importance of upgrading a mother’s level of child care, and overall child safety and security".

I mean ... come on. I understand that motherhood can be a challenge and not everyone is as natural as the other but can someone please explain which part of having unrestrained child in a vehicle that travels at least 120 km per hour is UNCLEAR when safety and child care are considered? How simple can you be? If that is not clear to a mother and/or father then I think something is seriously wrong here. Certainly in cases like this the parents should both lose their driver's licence AND the car AND should be put on some kind of parenting for dummies course?

Shit, if it was up to me [life can be so unfair] their parenting rights would be revoked all together.

Bathroom Blues

Can someone please explain to me why in a country that has the UK standard in electrical plugs someone has still opted for installing a completely different power outlet in the bathroom? What is the logic here?


And above all, why is that damn outlet decorated with a picture that shows a chap shaving his beard?
Am I to understand that this electricity outlet is only meant for men? I mean, don't get me wrong, I am the last person you can typify as a feminist but still, it seems to me that women in average spend much more hours in the bathroom. What about blow drying hair, curling it, warming up wax for some strategic trimming, recharging your electric toothbrush and the likes? If you did purchase those items here, the chances are that they have the three pin plug which [even though as a woman you may try] will not fit that hole?

And once we are talking about this, what the f**k is up with all these different "standards"?? Why does every region have to have some slight modification to everything? If it is not the plug then for sure it is the other end ... I am not even going to mention any exact figures here but the amount of different types of chargers I own is just staggering. Honestly, few trips around the world and living in different countries have guaranteed that my household inventory is mainly consisting of different, obsolete cables and plugs. The world economy is making an interesting turnover on items that are completely unnecessary. I mean, can we really not just have one universal charger? Then again, some engineer will probably turn it into something as useless as the universal remote control which you never manage to operate since you do not anymore have [or cannot locate] the 3 kilo weighing manual with 1,230,000 different codes for different brands AND which always seems to be missing the one you are looking for.

Oh how complicated life is ...

Blame it on the language!

Four years ago I started blogging while I was still living in Netherlands - it became a way to keep my mother tongue alive and vent all of my [many] frustrations. Funnily enough that channel was never really directed to my friends and family as a mean to stay in touch, I would rather just moan to complete strangers. Oh the joy!

As I moved on to Dubai I managed to keep up writing for a while and even fantasized of starting something new in Dutch [yet another language to keep from dying]. The truth was though that I was not even able to keep up writing in Finnish. Somehow the whole urge of writing died off and I guess I just went on living.

In retrospect that was a bloody shame since now when I look back at my old posts I remember loads of stuff that I haven't even thought about in ages. Blogging is such a good way of recording your life and certainly shows that even though our life just seems to flow by, so many events and thoughts pass by and we don't seem to even note them as it happens. It is only afterwards that we seem to be able to connect the dots. So therefore yet another attempt to start recording things ... and this time in language that is impossible to forget.